angry

i woke up angry today with this thought on my mind; if a guy cheats on his girl, why does the girl then get mad at the girl he cheated with and not at the guy hiimself?? is it not safe for us as women to express anger towards the male species? is this why we have so much trouble going honestly and vulnerably to God??? (who is, in fact, a man/male figure.) i mean sure, maybe the guy will hear about it but more likely than not, the guy gets forgiven and the girl gets the grudge held against her.

is this how our brains actually work or is this how we have been conditioned to treat each other in society? do i even want the answer to this question??

we're so good at tearing each other down. stalking each other on the internet. giving backhanded compliments. pretending to like each other in public. gossiping about each other, stabbing each other in the back and y'all the only reason i know is because i am good at these things too. it's like i have an affinity for pettiness instead of sainthood and dang it all, men have been sinning since the beginning of time but it is eve whose name is brought up and blamed in Christian circles. are women blameless? no. (although our fair sex is home to the only perfect human just SAYING.) but we catch a lot of undeserved flak and we catch it from each other. every time you slut shame another girl because your "man" (this is debatable) looked at her, you are adding to the problem. every time you exclude a girl, ANY girl, even if you don't know the girl, from your little clique at church, you are adding to the problem. any time you don't invite a mother to your mom's group because you don't like the way she parents her kids, you are adding to the problem.

you. not her. you. (because no one is a problem for existing as who God created them to be.)

you upset with me yet? sweet mercy i hope so. now let's point that anger in the right direction. i know it would be nice to keep it pointing at me or at whoever has wronged you or whoever has done whatever that you want to use as an excuse to dehumanize them but it's not Christian, it's not nice, and you need to get your butt in the confessional and get your act together. remember how confession doesn't actually count unless you are truly sorry AND make a firm purpose of amendment?? a firm purpose of amendment means you are promising God you will make the necessary changes in your life to avoid committing the same sins over and over. you can't confess to excluding someone and then refuse to look at them or talk to them at church on Sunday. or you can, but i surely wouldn't want to be in your shoes when you meet Our Maker. He can read your heart, you know. do you want Him seeing what is written there in regards to some of your sisters in Christ? no? then change it. now. before it's too late because one day, it will be.

so now that i've pissed you off, what should you do with your anger? that's simple and hard: change. righteous anger is meant to move us from passivity into action, to get us off our butts in the face of injustice and make things right. the biggest battles we will ever face are the interior ones, the ones against ourselves.

i prayed the 4th mystery of my rosary this morning for the people who have hurt me, intentionally or otherwise; i prayed the 5th mystery for all the people i have hurt, intentionally or otherwise. it's not a coincidence that both times, more women than men came to mind. it's so easy to be nasty and it's so hard to hold men accountable in this day and age ...so we take our frustrations out on each other. i do too. please stop. please pray for me and help me stop.

we're powerful, you know. we're underestimated, undersold and overlooked. we who sit in the pews faithfully and pray. satan needs us, craves our souls and pits us against each other but we don't need him and we don't have to play his games. i hope i've given you something to think about. let's stop perpetuating the crimes of satan foisted on us by society against each other. we're all victims of the types of behavior i named in this post, all of us. we've got common ground. let's start there.